Sigh. It's another Monday morning and I feel dreadful. Kind of because it was not the best weekend, partly because it's Monday and I'm back to work (here. :| ) and partly because it's a gloomy day and I just found out that Brittany Murphy passed away at the age of 32... of natural causes.
I'm turning 29 in a few days and that's scary as all hell. It makes me wonder what life has in store for me. Sometimes I feel like I'll live to be 200 years old and sometimes I feel like it's my last day around. The inconsistency of life never ceases to astound me. You never know who's next or when they'll go. If today is my last day, I'd like to be living it up, not sitting in an office working. But then again, who does?
When I was an eager pup of 17, I had determined that I would live my life everyday like it was my last. I'm sure everyone makes these declarations when they're young and naive. But how many people actually live it. I know a few do. They make sure everyday is a celebration of some sort. Of love, happiness, something. And there's me. I'm in a rut that I desperately want out of.
I think I've fallen into this ever since I moved back to India. I've never really felt quite at home here and I always felt that if I move away, life will be great again. But how much of this is just wishful thinking and reminiscing of glory days. What's to say that if I lived anywhere, my life would be any different from how it is today. Just a different office, a different setting but the same routine.
My greatest fear is that I will never find what it is that makes me truly happy. Whether it's the job, a place, I don't know. And I keep waiting for stuff to happen to me. I know this is a coward's way out but I don't know what I need to do to find some peace of mind and some fulfillment.
I really hate feeling the way I am right now. I really wish I could up and leave and damn the consequences but unfortunately, I cannot.
I have always promised myself that I would be fearless and never be poor. I mean, monetarily. Towards that end, I'm making headway but what about everything else. Am I willing to sacrifice the rest of life in pursuit of money? But at the same time, I can't go out and do what makes me happy because I have no clue what it is that will make me happy.
I sound like a mess and I kind of feel that way too.
Book Review : Prince of Ayodhya - Ashok K. Banker
Posted by CK in Book Review, Prince of Ayodhya, Ramayana
And another book done. And this time, I finished it in record time, I'm proud to say. I completed the 500-odd pages of Prince of Ayodhya in one day. I started the book in the morning on the bus ride to work and was done by the time I hit the sack later that night. I read it at lunch, in the loo, on the bus ride back and any other spare moment I got. And the reason is, for the first time in a LONG time, I just couldn't put the book down. It was brilliant. It took me back to the days when I read The Lord of the Rings for the first time. I used to read it in class, during lunch, in the loo (yes, that's where the best reading is done). The writing was brilliant, the subject riveting and the characters, real and relatable. "How," you might ask, "are characters from a 3000 year old epic relatable?" To which I would say... READ THE BOOK. No, really. It was a contemporary look at the legendary classic The Ramayana. Ashok Banker took a few liberties, sure, but then again, who doesn't? And the result is a story that is gritty, full of adventure, fantasy & drama with just the right mix of mythology thrown in.
Book Review : 2001 A Space Odyssey - Arthur C Clarke
Posted by CK in 2001 A Space Odyssey, Book Review
I have just finished another book and this one is quite the contrast to my recently completed Wodehouse classic. 2001 A Space Odyssey has been called one of the greatest science fiction novels of all time and one of the greatest movies of all time. Just as well because both the book and the movie were written almost simultaneously.
Both Poole and Bowman fall in to a routine that, if all goes well, will not be disturbed for a few years until they hit Saturn orbit. Then the remaining astronauts are woken up and research commences. But, of course, something goes wrong. HAL starts malfunctioning and reporting errors when there are none. When the two, after much deliberation, decide to disconnect HAL, the computer takes matters into its own hands and kills Poole when he ventures outside the ship for some repair work. Bowman who is inside tries waking up another astronaut for help, at which time HAL opens the airlocks and vents the ship's atmosphere trying to kill Bowman and hence protect himself. Bowman manages to survive and disconnects HAL.
Here, you have your Frankenstein complex come into play. Man builds something more advanced than he is but it eventually turns on him and it is his own undoing. Now, with HAL no longer a threat and the remaining astronauts are all dead, Mission Control tells him that the purpose wasn't just a study of Saturn but that it was a mission of paramount significance. The monolith, before it fell silent, had sent one strong burst of energy in the direction of Saturn and to Japetus (a moon of Saturn) in particular. It was kept hush-hush but the hibernating astronauts were trained to study whatever it was the monolith was trying to communicate with. With the usual human paranoia, they wonder if it's an alarm sent out setting into motion an advancing army of aliens or just a simple signal. Since he's the sole survivor of the mission crew, he must find out what is out there, in the name of humanity.
Bowman, amazed at first, accepts this and again falls into a routine till Saturn orbit is achieved. He's overwhelmed by the fact that he is to be the representative for all humankind, for better or for worse. As they approach Japetus, Bowman keeps wondering what awaits him and he finds out soon enough. As he hits orbit, he finds something that is nothing short of astounding.
On the surface of Japetus is another monolith far larger than its little cousin on the moon. This one is 2000 feet high and proportional in every other way to the moon monolith. And as Bowman flies towards it to investigate, it awakens after 3 million years of waiting. It accesses its instructions as to what to do when this eventuality happens and opens up to let him in. It is a Star Gate.
Bowman falls through sending one last signal to Earth before he vanishes. He says, "The thing's hollow - it goes on for ever - and - oh my God - it's full of stars!"
He is then transported through sights and sounds that defy human comprehension. He passes stars, galaxies, nebulae and astronomical phenomena that are beyond our wildest dreams. He sees ancient abandoned space ports and ship yards until finally, he falls into a star. A red sun where he sees brilliant lights and lands in a hotel lobby. It's a perfect recreation of what a hotel would look like in any city in America. At closer inspection, he sees that it's all fake. A phone book with nothing inside, cereal boxes that outwardly look like Earth brands but filled with an alien substance. He believes that if the aliens would wanted to have killed him, all they needed to do was to let space take him. He lies down after a while and as he sleeps, his entire life flashes before him in reverse order. He dreams with clear vividness, all the important events in his life and realizes that all his memories are being drained and stored and he feels himself changing. The same creatures that created the monolith are probing him the way the monolith did to the ape-men and Moon Watcher but this time with a different objective. To push man to the next stage of evolution. He opens his eyes as a being of pure energy. He is the Star Child.
He exists in space and time as a being that is both immortal and omnipotent. He then encounters other energy beings that show him how to jump through space and all its dimensions (not just three) with ease and he realizes that the Universe is his playground.
He returns to Earth and as he approaches, the nations of the world panic and launch their nuclear warheads at this new entity that is coming at them. With a thought. he destroys all the warheads on the planet. And just like Moon Watcher before him, he's the master of the world and wonder what he will do next. "I'll think of something.", he says to himself.
I find the entire story and premise fascinating. I have always thought (like other sci-fi fans, I'm sure) that when the human potential is completely realized (we utilize 100% of our brain), we will achieve something akin to Godhood. We will be capable of acts and feats that, right now, we attribute to the supernatural and impossible. I would love to be David Bowman and achieve control over mind & matter and have all the knowledge of the stars at my fingertips.
For anybody who loves science fiction, don't miss it.
Book Review : Imperial Blandings - P.G.Wodehouse
Posted by CK in Book Review, Imperial Blandings, Wodehouse
(previous post - Memories - Saudi Part I)
So, that's where I grew up, initially. Now, when it came to school, I attended International Indian School, Dammam. Now, the school only started in 1982 and when I started attending it in 1985, it was a wee school with a few hundred students and a few dozen teachers. Today, this behemoth is home to 14,500 students and over 600 teachers. I believe, it is the biggest school in the Gulf.
By the time I left the school in 1997, it was now located in the above building. The beauty of schools in Saudi is that they are all segregated by sex. If you have 7000 boys on one side of the campus, you have 7000 girls on the other side, both seperated by high walls and fraternizing across the wall was not only frowned upon but was punishable.
My dad served on the Managing Committee of the school, which was chosen by the Indian Ambassador to Saudi at the time, Mr.Hamid Ansari (who is now the Vice-President of India). So, this made school both extra-enjoyable and extra-tricky for me. I could always rely on things getting done two minutes before I wanted them but at the same time, if I ever got in to trouble, then Dad would also be aware two minutes before the deed was done. I made some great friends in school, ALL of whom are married now, with kids, which is scary but that is another topic for another day.
We used to spend our weekends (Thursday and Friday in the Middle East) visiting Dammam and Khobar and the only thing and I repeat, the only thing we had to do as kids was visit malls or play sports. Am I talking fun malls with movie theaters and crazyness? Nope, just sprawling malls where you'd walk around with friends (movie halls don't exist in the Kingdom because they're "un-Islamic") and maybe, if you're lucky, spot a cute girl. Now, anywhere else in the world, this would mean that the girl is actually cute, but in Saudi, where ALL the women wear Burqas (infernal cloths that cover them from head to toe with an eye slit to look through) the phrase takes a new meaning.
So, when we spot girls, they had to have exquisite eyes or great hands. And you're not allowed to stare either, cause then you'll be rushed by other Saudi males and you will be summarily beaten for "dishonoring a female". Soo, all my friends were AWESOME at sports. I, myself, wasn't great but I could hold my own.
Saudi is a strange land with archaic customs that were old-fashioned a hundred years ago. But yet, they remain. No one dares say anything for fear of repercussions from the all powerful Mutawwas. I'd have a lot to say but Wiki summarizes it better:
"The Mutaween in Saudi Arabia are tasked with enforcing Sharia as defined by the government, specifically by the Committee for the Propagation of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice (CPVPV). The Mutaween of the CPVPV consists of "more than 3,500 officers in addition to thousands of volunteers...often accompanied by a police escort." They have the power to arrest unrelated males and females caught socializing, anyone engaged in homosexual behavior or prostitution; to enforce Islamic dress-codes, and store closures during the prayer time. They enforce Muslim dietary laws, prohibit the consumption or sale of alcoholic beverages and pork, and seize banned consumer products and media regarded as un-Islamic (such as CDs/DVDs of various Western musical groups, television shows and film). Additionally, they actively prevent the practice or proselytizing of other religions within Saudi Arabia, where they are banned."
I'm feeling quite nostalgic today so I thought I'd revisit some of the places I've been to in the past, through pictures and memories.
I was born in India waaay back in 1980 and moved quite quickly to Saudi Arabia. My parents were doctors and they were working there so I spent the next 17 years of my life in the sun-soaked country where temperatures reach 55 degrees Celsius (that's 131 Fahrenheit, for those of you who are metrically challenged). I had a good childhood. I spent the first few years in a place called Al-Oyoun in Saudi's Eastern Province. It's a sleepy little town (oasis) about 60kms inland from the sea. It's near the populous Eastern Province city of Hofuf. It was 120 kms back and forth to school everyday which isn't as bad as it sounds when cars can speed at 130-140 kmph.
It's not abnormal to see sword-wielding Bedouins in Oyoun's quiet streets as the entire area is still unofficially under the rule of the powerful and proud Shi'ite Muslim tribes in the predominantly Sunni Kingdom.
"In classic Arabic, Ahsa means the sound of water underground. It has one of the largest oases in the world with Date Palms of the best in the world, the oasis is located about 60 km inland from the Persian Gulf. All Urban areas are located in the traditional oasis of Al-Ahsa. In addition to the oasis, the county also includes the giant Empty Quarter desert, making it the largest county in Saudi Arabia in terms of area. The Empty Quarter has the world's largest oil fields and connects Saudi Arabia to Qatar, the UAE, and Oman."
The gun and sword laws aren't really enforced because, it is rumored, that these tribes can ride out and set fire to these fields at a whim and the government would be powerless to stop them.
So, as I was saying, going to school was an adventure. It's a beautiful drive, too. When you're driving, you have nothing but the highway in front of you and the desert in every direction. The first 5 years of my life, I spent at least 2-3 hours a day looking out at the sands and dunes roll by and it seemed like they were frozen relics of a time when the country was at the mercy of the elements and humans hadn't yet found the courage to wander the unforgiving landscape or disturb it, lest they awake some primeval beast from that deceptively quiet and beautiful scene. But, I remember feeling safe despite there being nothing but openness in every direction. I felt like nothing could disturb me there and it always seemed a welcome place. Once in a while, I'd see a herd of camel roll by and they seemed not to notice us and our trespass.
After a few years, we moved to Tarout. Tarout is a little island just off the coast of Saudi. It connects to the coastal town of Qatif which is one of the largest oil-producing cities in the world. In Tarout, there was a village called Sanabes and this is where I spent the next 8 years of my life. It was gorgeous. We lived about a few hundred meters off the beach and yes, it was palm-lined and the high-tide used to bring the water to a point where it almost touched the road that ran the perimeter of the island.
We used to go for walks along the beach at night. If you notice on the map, the entire central part of the island shows no habitation. That's because it was nothing but date palms and stud farms. Here they used to breed championship Arabian stallions the way they did way back in the day and I'm sure these animals never went for less than a few $100,000. And I could see the trainers running these horses up and down the beach at times, training them, exercising them. Even as a kid, I knew that I was in a special place. From our window on the 4th floor, we used to be able to look out at all of Sanabes and then right out to sea. We could see the three oil platforms of Ras Tanura and these massive tankers pulling up beside them.
This place is even more like the land that time forgot than the rest of Saudi. Saudi is a paradoxical place. It has rich, luxurious cities with everything in the world that oil-money can buy but it is also a thousand villages, with houses built of mud and people in their thobs and burquas selling dates and drinking black tea on carpets on dusty roads. I lived for the better half of my childhood amongst these people. The nomads and the date-sellers.
"Tarut or Tarout means goodness and beauty in the Semitic languages. Additionally, the town’s name is recorded as "TARU" in historical Chinese texts and "Ashtarut " in Arabic history. Today, however, most of the new researchers argue that the correct name is "Ashtarut " because the Canaanites and Phoenicians, who originally lived there, idolized the beauty of the town and called it Ashtarut.
We cannot separate the history of Tarut Island from the Eastern Arabian Peninsula's history. Tarut Island has survived for thousands of years and its antiquities prove that it was inhabited since the Stone Age, approximately 5000 B.C. It died several civilizations ago and was part of many Empires and countries. Some of them were before Christ, such as Dilmun, the Akkadian country, the Assyrian country, and the Persian Empire. Others were after Christ such as the Persian Empire, the Islamic country, the Portuguese Empire, and the Ottoman Empire. Now, Tarut Island belongs to Qatif city in the Eastern province of Saudi Arabia. It was a place of economic migration because of its important strategic location and it was a trade center between Indian contraries, the Arabian Peninsula and Iraq. In addition, it has a lot of natural resources, including pearl fisheries and date farms."
In the heart of Tarout, is this massive sand fortress that is, I believe, over 400 years old. I used to see it everyday passing by it, as a kid and I remember thinking that it still looked impregnable just like it must have when it was first built.
(to be continued)
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On Art8 years ago
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tête-à-tête
1. Private conversation; familiar interview or conference of two persons.
2. A short sofa intended to accommodate two persons.
3. Private; confidential; familiar.
adv. 1. Face to face; privately or confidentially; familiarly.